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Uldum Druid Flavor Text
- Elise the Enlightened - From cartographer to combatant, Elise has taken the road less traveled - because no one else could find it on a map.
- Untapped Potential - The official term is "strategic laziness."
- Anubisath Defender - Also comes running when he hears a can opener.
- Crystal Merchant - I won't ask about your mana curve if you don't ask where I got these.
- Overflow - It's a high five followed by a low tide.
- Hidden Oasis - Amazing that it's been hidden, given the twenty-foot treant splashing around in it.
- Garden Gnome - "Greetings, my little shrubs... It's whittlin' time."
- Oasis Surger - Surge's up, dude!
- BEEEES!!! - Right before CEEEES!!!
- Worthy Expedition - This isn't where I parked my mount.
Uldum Hunter Flavor Text
- Dinotamer Brann - Brann's new dino-taming hobby is going well - his pet can already make him sit, stand, and roll over!
- Unseal the Vault - "Huh... That's a nice card back."
- Scarlet Webweaver - Isn't that nice? The spider made the explorer a sleeping bag!
- Wild Bloodstinger - Tame Bloodstingers would politely invite your minion to tea.
- Swarm of Locusts - Good things never come in swarms.
- Hyena Alpha - Everything the sun touches is ours - so long as it's already dead.
- Ramkahen Wildtamer - She gets to decide what cards go to the Hall of Fame.
- Desert Spear - Goes on the right, next to the desert spoon.
- Hunter's Pack - Oh look! It's a trap!
- Pressure Plate - The appropriate dishware for stressful situations.
Uldum Mage Flavor Text
- Reno the Relicologist - All his life, Reno Jackson was only a gatling wand away from becoming the greatest and most terrifying mage who ever existed.
- Raid the Sky Temple - "Why can't I hold all these scrolls?"
- Puzzle Box of Yogg-Saron - "PUT THE BOX DOWN, RENO!"
- Tortollan Pilgrim - A tortollan made it to the desert!
- Naga Sand Witch - 5 mana footlong, anyone?
- Dune Sculptor - Come for the magic show, stay for the sand castles.
- Arcane Flakmage - Ancient pandaren proverb: He who is without secrets lacks flak.
- Cloud Prince - "In West Cloudidelphia, born and raised; flinging lightning for the rest of my days."
- Flame Ward - Not to be confused with the burn ward.
- Ancient Mysteries - I'm not saying it was aliens, but it was TOTALLY aliens!
Uldum Paladin Flavor Text
- Sir Finley of the Sands - "The sands shall be my sea! And this scarab shall be my, er, strange and wriggly boat!"
- Making Mummies - "I do say, this gives me the vapors every single time!"
- Tip the Scales - Hold on, I need to get some murlocs to weigh in on this.
- Micro Mummy - The dramatically detailed terrifically trimmed replica of the real thing!
- Pharaoh's Blessing - Life hack: Sneeze near a pharaoh.
- Salhet's Pride - Pride cometh before the maul.
- Brazen Zealot - Some paladins really Light it up.
- Ancestral Guardian - No one knows whose ancestor he is, but he's still upset that you never call.
- Subdue - Like humility but more humiliating.
- Sandwasp Queen - Oooh, see that wasp! Watch that sting! Dig in the Sandwasp Queen!
Uldum Priest Flavor Text
- High Priest Amet - All minions are equal, but some minions are more equal than others.
- Activate the Obelisk - A one-eyed, one stone, towering purple minion healer.
- Plague of Death - Don't worry, there's a happy little funhouse right under that sand pit.
- Psychopomp - "Come with me if you want to re-live."
- Wretched Reclaimer - "Ok, here's the plan. We kill you, then bring you back." "Stronger?" "No, about the same."
- Holy Ripple - I still prefer the taste of banana fudge ripple.
- Grandmummy - A grandmummy's love is eternal.
- Sandhoof Waterbearer - Used to carrying for his team.
- Penance - This is what happens when you don't give a sincere apology.
- Embalming Ritual - "Guess what! We're getting a new cat."
Uldum Rogue Flavor Text
- Anka, the Buried - "You look familiar. Were you at my first funeral?"
- Bazaar Burglary - Just when you set up your "All-Natural Scented Candles" at the farmer's market and then some STUPID KOBOLD COMES AND TAKES THEM ALL!
- Shadow of Death - Making new friends takes skill.
- Whirlkick Master - C-c-combo!
- Bazaar Mugger - Premium muggings at a discount price.
- Sahket Sapper - "Here, you dropped this."
- Plague of Madness - Don't bring a candle to a knife fight.
- Hooked Scimitar - Oooooooooooow. I'm hooked on a scimitar!
- Clever Disguise - "It me! Togwaggle!"
- Pharaoh Cat - Mightiest of mousers, enduring in kingship of the upper and lower cat tree, conqueror of the red dot, the all-wise Catshepsut.
Uldum Shaman Flavor Text
- Vessina - She wasn't happy when Hagatha sent her back to Uldum. But her "angry" hiss sounds like her "happy" hiss, so no one knew the difference.
- Corrupt the Waters - This is why Hagatha is banned from public pools.
- Splitting Axe - The ancient shaman chant, "Control Axe, Control Vee."
- Plague of Murlocs - This is horrible! And adorable!
- Earthquake - Shake it, sh-sh-sh-shake it like a Kalimdor fissure.
- Mogu Fleshshaper - He's here to shape *clap* you up!
- Weaponized Wasp - Dr. Boom had one simple request: wasps with flippin' laser beams attached to their heads.
- Sandstorm Elemental - Doot doot doot doot doot [Pause] Doot doot doot doot doot DEE doot doot doot doot doot!
- EVIL Totem - A lot of people blame the parents when a totem goes bad.
- Totemic Surge - It's not really advanced shamanic magic, you just draw nasty eyebrows on them.
Uldum Warlock Flavor Text
- Dark Pharaoh Tekahn - He'll get that League of Explorers and their little murloc too!
- Supreme Archaeology - Archaeology is the discovery of rare and powerful artifacts. Supreme Archaeology is TAKING THEM!
- Riftcleaver - Brings you face to face with your destructive impulses.
- Diseased Vulture - He's off the twig! He's kicked the bucket! THIS IS AN EX-VULTURE!
- Impbalming - With your complexion, Imp Balm is a great demonizer.
- Expired Merchant - The "best by" date is more like a guideline.
- Plague of Flames - This is fine.
- Neferset Thrasher - Tough to do skateboard tricks with four legs.
- EVIL Recruiter - I'm starting to think the lackeys aren't evil, just taken advantage of.
- Sinister Deal - "So, what's in the sack?" "Something... sinister." "Okay, it's a deal."
Uldum Warrior Flavor Text
- Armagedillo - We may never know what provoked it, but we will never forget the consequences.
- Hack the System - Anything can be hacked, if you're holding an axe.
- Livewire Lance - The lance is heavy but it's the battery pack that really does a number on the shoulders.
- Bloodsworn Mercenary - You look really hurt. You could use a friend!
- Tomb Warden - Also known as an ancient copy machine.
- Plague of Wrath - "Thanks, I HATE it!"
- Into the Fray - "You are in my FRAY!"
- Armored Goon - Armored except for non-critical areas, such as the head, torso, fists and thighs.
- Restless Mummy - Life-separation anxiety syndrome.
- Frightened Flunky - Some people just aren't cut out to be supervillain material.
Uldum Neutral Flavor Text
- King Phaoris - When you're the king of the cats, the whole desert is your litterbox.
- Colossus of the Moon - Strike him down, and you'll face the Colossus of the New Moon.
- Octosari - Eight arms of sand-flinging, foe-wringing, card-slinging fury!
- Siamat - TAUNT. TAUNT.
- Zephrys the Great - "Of course it's perfect, you're just not seeing how to use it."
- Blatant Decoy - "Hah! You is being tricked by ME! Togwaggle!"
- Desert Obelisk - The Obelisk of the Stars can hide an entire land from prying eyes! Or zap a rando.
- Mortuary Machine - The ankle bone's connected to the shin bone. The knuckle bone's connected to the... eh, it'll be fine.
- Body Wrapper - She uses pickle slices for the eyes. Keeps them well-preserved.
- Vulpera Scoundrel - A spell is a spell, but the mystery choice could be anything! (It's also a spell.)
- History Buff - Actually... what happened was...
- Mischief Maker - Fair trade is for noble-minded suckers with dignity and honor.
- Dwarven Archaeologist - She's making great progress on paying off that advanced degree.
- Mogu Cultist - Mogu cultists have the worst team-building exercises.
- Wrapped Golem - The end result of one of the greatest wrap battles of all time.
- Khartut Defender - Gesundheit!
- Conjured Mirage - What you see is Isiset.
- Sunstruck Henchman - There is E.V.I.L. here that DOES sleep.
- Infested Goblin - Trust us. DON'T go cheap on the scarab repellent.
- Generous Mummy - Yeah, she's mummified, but her money hasn't dried up!
- Quicksand Elemental - Use a light abrasive to buff blemishes away but use a heavy abrasive to debuff problems.
- Neferset Ritualist - The Neferset are great�they'll always make sure their friends are feline fine.
- Questing Explorer - Earned her merit badges the hard way - twelve zhevra hooves at a time.
- Living Monument - This is not the greatest card in the world. This is just a monument.
- Anubisath Warbringer - Some dogs will bring you a bone or a squeaky toy. This one brings war!
- Pit Crocolisk - PIT! Not PET!
- Wasteland Scorpid - After they get to a certain size, it doesn't matter if they're poisonous or not.
- Faceless Lurker - Longtime lurker, first time attacker.
- Phalanx Commander - Turns out he's really good at herding cats.
- Wasteland Assassin - They'll never see me coming, what with my glowing body, eyes and daggers.
- Bone Wraith - It uses only the eco-friendly bones from free-range humanoids.
- Golden Scarab - Who actually puts all the gold plating on these things, and why?
- Candletaker - "You no waaaake caaaandle!"
- Desert Hare - After they're caught, they're dessert hares.
- Temple Berserker - He's back. He's angry. And he's here to wrap things up.
- Bug Collector - The only one who likes BEEEES!!!
- Fishflinger - The scent of fish lingers on the fishflinger's fish fingers.
- Injured Tol'vir - Me-OW!
- Serpent Egg - These things go from "adorable danger noodle!" to "MY FACE IS MELTING!" all too quickly.
- Vilefiend - Dreamed of becoming a Stylefiend, but fel was never in season.
- Spitting Camel - Were you expectorating another bad pun?
- Kobold Sandtrooper - Stay while, take candle.
- Beaming Sidekick - Sure, I'll carry the water! And the food! And the tents! And the cursed monkey paw!
- Jar Dealer - What's in the jar? It could be anyone!
- Murmy - Unlike other mummies, they rolled him up with rice, sliced cucumbers, and soy sauce on the side.